Will getting punished with a belt or cane make me a good lady later in life im13 mum use a belt or cane punish?

i get punished wth a belt or cane by my mum depending on what i done wrong she says it ll make me a better lady later in life and if i dont take my punishment she will put me in care i am 13 years old|||You poor girl, I have a family quite dominant in females and we have all grown to be independent, strong and good women. But we have never used the belt or any other forms of violent punishment to discipline us, no matter what we've done. You can become a strong, good lady later in life without a belt or cane, there are many examples of women out there who have grown to be great ladies and were not punished in this matter, they are very easy to find. Studies have shown that children who are hit by their parents are more prone to anti-social behaviour such as hitting other people, defying parents, and ignoring rules, and they are also more likely to be aggressive, which is quite ironic. So actually, the belt and cane is doing the opposite, it is proven that it won't help you become a "good lady" at all, but in the opposite direction. Also a child who is not hit is more likely to be smarter than a child who is hit, as studies have shown that kids who do not get hit are more exposed to reasoning and explanation by the parents when they are getting disciplined, instead of just hitting them . This develops their cognitive abilities and therefore IQ.


I have a friend who was hit with a spatula or wooden object by their mother when they did something wrong, and I tell you, they aren't in the best shape. They have a fair few mental and social issues, and at times they will randomly have aggressive attacks at people when something goes wrong, quite often at me even though its not my fault at all. They don't have the best social skills and are quite difficult to reason with in a logical and calm manner, as they tend to get aggressive and abusive. But I stay by their side anyway, as I am their friend and I empathise with their problems and try to help them with their behaviour.


I don't know if this would convince your mother, as she probably has strong beliefs in this form of parenting, but she needs to know that a girl can grow to be a good lady without a belt of cane, I wasn't brought up with a belt or cane and look at me, I'm intelligent, kind, independent, social and an overall happy lady, if I can say so myself, I'm not the most appropriate example but I'm sure there are loads and loads of highly respected and famous women who weren't hit by their mothers, just look them up, they are everywhere. The belt and the cane these days is outdated, in today's world it is understood and known that it is not an effective way of disclipining children. Good luck girl, stay strong, you might not be able to stop your mother's ways, but one day you will be free and I want you to know there is a way for your children and grandchildren to be good people WITHOUT a belt or cane, and to know that to solve your problems in life you can fix them justicely and effectively with good reasoning, logic and compassion, no violence needed at all. :)|||I don't know what country you are in but what your mum is doing to you is illegal in Europe and I would be surprised if this was not the case in the States as well.


why would this make you a good lady?


your Mum maybe had this done to her as well as a child and all it seems to have made her is a child batterer! not a better lady.


You need to find help this is definitely not acceptable. Do you have childline in your country?http://www.childline.org.uk/Pages/Home.a鈥?/a> no matter where you live you can talk to them online, and they will give you the proper advice that you most definately need. also have a forum where you can talk to kids in a similar position to yourself.


Good luck and i hope it stops.|||my dad gave me the old school italian treatment, you F up once you lose 2 teeth and im now 20, and honest person and a hard worker but my 3 brothers never got the same treatment and they run around stealing and doing what ever they want|||My dads hit me with a belt a few times but that's when I've really fcuked up, but your mom sounds like a creep. She'll put you in care if you don't take it? Lol, I wouldn't usually say this, but I think you'd be better off there.|||as good as a good telling off can be, getting whipped is terrible, i think it will just cause you yo grow up hating your mum for this and you may even pass it on to ur children|||Nobody has the right to do that to you, it's child abuse and you must tell your teachers.|||If this is true, you should report her. Talk to a school counsellor or so. It's abuse.